A Look into Adoption from an 8th Grader's Perspective

Brooke is one of the most creative, articulate, wise, "old souls" I've ever know. She's graduating from 8th grade this month. Two years ago her family adopted a beautiful, sweet, boy from Korea. The past couple years haven't been the easiest like some adoptive families would like you to believe about their "happily ever after". In some of the clearest words with simple, creative visuals Brooke tells her story and the story of her family.

Her story is a must-watch if you're adopting, know someone who has, or are considering adoption. It tells the whole story, and the whole story is worth telling.



** NOTE: Brooke's family attends our church. I got to know her last year when she was in my student leadership group. We've known her mom for years; she was our social worker when we were adopting Judah and Addise. We love this family. They gave me permission to share.

An Advocate for Orphans!

Do you know this woman? Her name is Irena Sendler. And she is a heroine!

She died on May 12, 2008 at the age of 98 years old in Warsaw, Poland.

During WWII, Irena, got permission to work in the Warsaw ghetto, as a Plumbing/Sewer specialist. She had an ulterior motive.

Irena smuggled Jewish infants out in the bottom of the tool box she carried. She also carried a burlap sack in the back of her truck, for larger kids.

Irena kept a dog in the back that she trained to bark when the Nazi soldiers let her in and out of the ghetto. The soldiers, of course, wanted nothing to do with the dog and the barking covered the kids/infants noises.

During her time of doing this, she managed to smuggle out and save 2500 kids and infants.

Ultimately, she was caught, however, and the Nazi's broke both of her legs and arms and beat her severely.

Irena kept a record of the names of all the kids she had smuggled out in a glass jar that she buried under a tree in her back yard. After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may have survived and tried to reunite the family. Most had been gassed. Those kids she helped got placed into foster family homes or adopted.

In 2007 Irena was up for the Nobel Peace Prize. She was not selected. (Al Gore won, for a slide show on Global Warming.)

You Can Have it All...

You can have it all.

You just can't have it all, all the time.

Long before I became a mom, I was investigating what exactly motherhood would do to my full and fast-paced life. I ravenously observed moms (especially working moms), asked intrusive questions, and engaged in lots of discussion from women who's lives I admired. As I soaked in wisdom, mistakes, lessons learned, and whatnot from these amazing women, Brian and I had a bajillion conversations about what our life would look like when we had kids. 

Perhaps the best phrase that was given to me in those early days was from friend/mentor/ministry partner, Kara Powell. Over lunch she dropped this apropos bomb: "I firmly believe you can have it all. You just can't have it all, all the time." She went on to share quite honestly and vulnerably with me about her highs and lows of being a working mom. She shared about the necessary sacrifices of being a working mom. She shared about calling and passion and stewardship of gifts. She shared her heart with me and it resonated in my own.

Her story resonated with me on a deep level and since becoming a mom nearly 2 years ago, I can affirm the weighty truth of her statement. Basically, I can only do two things in my life these days: work and family. To me, that's my "ALL" these days. Allow me to elaborate.

I do not make fancy dinners 5 nights a week. I do not workout, like EVER. I don't do crafts with my kids. I don't go out with girlfriends every week. My house gets cleaned, oh, about every 2-3 weeks. Dishes are regularly found in my sink. I shop online because getting to physical stores is about impossible. I have several returns in the trunk of my car from the few times I have made it into a real store. I do not bake. My kids are bathed every 2-3 days (way less often for poor Baby #3). Day 3 and 4 hair is all too common (as are ponytails). I got my hair cut last week for the first time in 5+ months. I return voice mails at an embarrassingly slow rate. I have a dozen undone home projects that taunt me. 

But I think I'm a darn good mother (and wife...hopefully the hubby agrees) and employee. Those two things are quite literally the only things I have time for. Still, quite honestly there are some days when I'm an amazing mom and a crappy employee, then other days when I'm a shabby mom and incredible employee. "Balance" is an illusion and I do not pursue it. "Perfection" is the worst curse word. Yet at the end of a given week (or month) I can proudly look back and say "I have it all - three healthy and thriving children and a fulfilling, high capacity job." 

If we live in the same zip code, I could take you out to coffee (during naps, of course) and share all my secrets and sins of "how" this works in a our chaotic family of 5, but for now I want to join the women who've gone before me and exclaim, YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL. But it'll cost you some things and you'll have to be darn smart in discerning what "all" means for you because being a mom will illuminate your limits and highlight your competencies more than anything else.

Here's to women! I'm certain we could rule the world. XOXO

PS. For another perspective on this long-standing conversation, this manifesto from a high powered working mom is haunting, truthful, and challenging. I'd very much encourage you to read it.