Listen and Obey

These are the 2 things we are working most with Judah on these days: listening to and obeying mommy and daddy. Period. All things parenting are spiritual lessons, but I think this one might be at the core.

My working theory is this: if you cannot learn to listen and obey your parents when you are young, it makes it pretty difficult when you are older to listen to the voice of God and obey him.

Thus, we are working really hard with Judah on these two actions these days. We want him to listen and obey not so he becomes our little submissive robot, but so he can experience freedom and all he was created to be. So it is with God.

My friend, Rebecca, took this principle to another level. Listening and obeying are ultimately Judah's choices, but as his parents we have a huge responsibility to help Judah WANT to listen and obey by HOW we instruct him, correct him, and ultimately love him. He has a part, but our part is pretty huge. [Geez, parenting really is tough when you consider these these long-term effects!]

In order to become the best mom I can be, I'm practicing [not "trying"...see Dallas Willard's works] listening more to the voice of God and obeying him. I recognize more and more that God wants the best for me, he understands more than I do, and since he's my Father and Mother, he has my best interest at heart. My hope in parenting well is being parented by the author of Motherhood.

Newborns

A wise adoptive momma friend told me a couple years ago that the pain of infertility didn't end for her until her 2 little Ethiopian princesses came home. I didn't believer her, but it was TOTALLY true!

Even since our kids have come home, I've still experienced motherhood grief. The most recent sting was like a punch to the gut. A dear friend had her baby girl 7 weeks ago. The "Diaz 4" were among the first at the hospital to welcome sweet baby Harper into the world.

Several weeks later I saw Liz and Harper at our staff meeting. The scene was classic newborn: Harper got cranky. Liz instinctively scooped up her infant and snuggled her into her chest where her itty-bitty baby cuddled for the next 30 minutes.

As I watched this beautiful scene out of the corner of my eye, my heart and eyes unexpectedly welled. I instantly felt this intense loss of not being able to do that for Judah and Addise. I wondered if their biological mothers had nurtured them like that. I longed to have known them from those teensy-tiny days where they weighed less than 10 pounds. I felt the pang of not being able to bond with them from those first days of life. The first picture I have of Judah is 1 month after his 2nd birthday. I simply wished that I have been a part of their story from Day 1.

This is one of the odd things of adoption. Judah and Addise are 100% my children, and yet there is so much a part of their story that I do not know. It feels like I've birthed them, but there's a gap in knowing them. Adoption is the encapsulation of everything as it should be [redemption, love, reconciliation, healing] and everything as it wasn't meant to be [loss, poverty, death].

So while there is already tremendous healing through becoming J&A's momma, it's not yet complete. Such is the Kingdom on Earth...

First Family Vacation - Advice?

Next week we are headed on our first family vacation!!! I know, I know. I just got back from maternity leave. But a combination of perfect storms came together for us to pull off this nearly free 10-day vacation to one of our favorite spots in the world - Fort Myers Beach, Florida. Sure, it's not Bora Bora, but this place holds a deeply meaningful place in our hearts. Someone in my family owns a GORGEOUS penthouse condo on the Beach. Nearly 10 years ago when Brian and I were poor and newlyweds, we went here for our wedding. We fell in love there together - with the condo and our marriage - and have been back multiple times since. The condo has become a place of refueling, rest, recalibration, reconnection, and just FUN. I know it's silly to go from the beach on one coast to the other, but trust me - this beach is different from the chilly, choppy SoCal ocean.

This time we are taking our children. It is our first family vacation and we are gitty. We've never been to the condo with our kids. We've never vacationed with them. We realize this will be a very different kind of vacation for many, many reasons, so we'd love some input from y'all about what to do, no do, expect, pack, travel, etc. I was prompted to ask for some help especially after reading a new friend's post regarding her vacation last week.

PLEASE help a girl out. :)