Not-So-Instant Family

One of the more annoying comments people make to me is "how fast your adoption is!" OR "your family will double overnight!" I know it's very well intended, but it still annoys me. Why? Because it's been a VERY long journey for us to become a family. It's been far from instant. It's far from overnight. And it hasn't been quick at all.

So, if you've said something like that to me - don't worry about it. I'm not mad at you. If you haven't said something like that to me yet, please don't. And don't say it to another family dealing with infertility or going through adoption. While it's well intentioned, it's not helpful. Hope that's a helpful tip as you interact with others.

While that may sound bitter or edgy, I'm not that bent out of shape with those types of comments. Often, people don't really know what to say about our journey and are doing their best to engage with us. Yet, I'm primarily okay with it because not much of what's really good in life is instant: food, relationships, transformation, character building, etc...The really good things in life take time to work into something great, substantive, and life-changing.

Instant and gratification don't go well together - that's a stupid American idea. Our family isn't so instant, but it will be oh-so gratifying.

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April L. Diaz

April has been a visionary activist her entire life. She has made it her mission to lead high performing teams and develop leaders in the margins of society while caring for our bodies, mind, and spirit. Secretly, she’s a mix of a total girly girl and a tomboy, and is still crazy about her high school sweetheart, Brian. Together, they co-parent 3 fabulous kiddos and live in Orange County, CA.